First aid doesn’t have to be complicated. These pearls of wisdom will address many worrisome situations.
- If you are choking on an ice cube, don’t panic. Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto, the blockage will almost instantly be removed.
- Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.
- For high blood pressure sufferers: Cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.
- A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button. [Not really first aid-related until after you wake up.]
- If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives. You’ll then be afraid to cough.
- Have a bad toothache? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you will forget about the toothache.
A final riddle: What are the only two tools you will ever need?
WD-40 and duct tape.
If it doesn’t move and should, use the WD-40.
If it shouldn’t move and does, use the duct tape.