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You Know Youre an Engineer If …

Issue 10 and Volume 102.

You Know You`re an Engineer If …

You stare at an orange juice container because it says CONCENTRATE.

Your wrist watch has more computing power than a 486DX-50.

Your spouse sends you an e-mail instead of calling you to dinner.

Your idea of good interpersonal communication means getting the decimal point in the right place.

You look forward to the holidays only to put together the kids` toys.

You have used coat hangers and duct tape for something other than hanging coats and taping ducts.

You window shop at Radio Shack.

Your ideal evening consists of fast-forwarding through the latest sci-fi movie looking for technical inaccuracies.

You don`t even know where the cover to your personal computer is.

When the microphone or visual aids at a meeting don`t work, you rush up to the front to fix it.

You think that when people around you yawn, it`s because they didn`t get enough sleep.

You are convinced you can build a phaser out of your garage door opener and your camera`s flash attachment.

You have a functioning home copier machine, but every toaster you own turns bread into charcoal.

Your three year old son asks why the sky is blue and you try to explain atmospheric absorption theory.

You thought the real heroes of “Apollo 13” were the mission controllers.

You did the sound system for your senior prom.

You still own a slide rule and you know how to work it.

You know the direction the water swirls when you flush.

You rotate your screen savers more frequently than your automobile tires.

You have more toys than your kids.

You have introduced your kids by the wrong name.

You have a habit of destroying things in order to see how they work.

You can remember 7 computer passwords, but not your anniversary.

You can type 70 words a minute, but can`t read your own handwriting.

Your checkbook always balances.

Your I.Q. number is bigger than your weight.

You have more friends on the Internet than in real life.

You ever burned down the gymnasium with your Science Fair project.

You spend more on your home computer than your car.

You`ve ever tried to repair a $5.00 radio.

You own one or more white short-sleeve dress shirts.

You have ever saved the power cord from a broken appliance.

You have a neatly sorted collection of old bolts and nuts in your garage. p

Editor`s note: Corporate communications has evolved to the point where it seems the highest and most common use of e-mail is the dissemination of jokes and humor stories to business acquaintances around the world. Power Engineering has collected a number of such communications from many anonymous e-mail sources and will present them in this space for your enjoyment. We welcome your contributions of engineering, technology or business related humorous pieces to [email protected], but please do not send copyrighted material.